no sense.

I don't know why, I just love to see you smile.

risks?

Desiring another person is perhaps the most risky endeavor of all. As soon as you want somebody—really want him—it is as though you have taken a surgical needle and sutured your happiness to the skin of that person, so that any separation will now cause a lacerating injury

spoke as well.

I have a history of making decisions very quickly about men. I have always fallen in love fast and without measuring risks. I have a tendency not only to see the best in everyone, but to assume that everyone is emotionally capable of reaching his highest potential. I have fallen in love more times than I care to count with the highest potential of a man, rather than with the man himself, and I have hung on to the relationship for a long time (sometimes far too long) waiting for the man to ascend to his own greatness. Many times in romance I have been a victim of my own optimism.

wiser to surrender.

In the end, though, maybe we must all give up trying to pay back the people in this world who sustain our lives. In the end, maybe it's wiser to surrender.

not in a good mood.

could you please shut up your mouth?
I needed space for my own self.

dunno dunno.

1. I always imagine my family and loved ones are dead, just so I can feel what my reaction would be. I usually shed a tear. I imagined my mom dead, and I felt extremely sad, no smile…
2. Everything in my life may be amazing, but I’ll always feel empty without you.
3. I wish I could see you again. & ask you how life has been treating you. Maybe even laugh with you. How I miss your laugh.
4. If you really loved me for the past two years, you’d care enough to at least give me what I deserve.

Pick your story,

1. There are people who give so much love to those who don’t love them back.
2. There are some who feel so loved and find out in the end that they were fooled.
3. There are some who is into mutual love but can’t call their partner as their own because someone already holds the title.
4. There are some who give so much love but the other won’t believe because s/he always considers your past.
5. There are some who receive so much love but can’t seem to move on from previous relationship.
6. Others just want to play the game and choose their playmate.

a dreamer.

do you know what hurts the most?
 you’ll never be mine and I’ll never be yours.
 we’ll be two people with separate lives. you will never see me the way that I see you. I know that I could wish on every falling star, but my wish would be worth nothing. cause you’re just a dream and I’m the dreamer.

I get kinda irritated when “instant messages” aren’t instant.

like 50 - 60 minutes gaps between replies.
if you're busy, just say so. then go do what're you doing.

Forgiven.

For me, the most difficult expression of love is forgiveness. They say love is a commitment, it’s waking up everyday committing yourself to loving that one person you chose. It’s not that hard, I think. It’s not that hard to love someone you have always loved. But loving someone who has hurt you? Who seeks your forgiveness (or not) and wants you to love them back again? That’s hard for me. It’s a daily commitment for me, till I can forget, to look at you everyday and remember all the good things that you have done and are doing. It’s finding the person I once loved inside the person that hurt me. It’s looking at the scars you have given me and trying to be thankful there aren’t more. It’s looking at how you are trying or how I just need to get over the hurt because I’m just dragging myself into a downward spiral. It’s not punishing you anymore.
So here I am, saying I forgive you. I forgive you for hurting me intentionally and saying you love me at the same time. I forgive you for all the wrong things you did then. And I hope in my forgiveness, you see my love